The Power of Empathetic Listening

Have you ever had the privilege of conversing with someone and feeling truly seen and heard? When someone listens well and understands you, the tone of the conversation changes. Listening well is a gift we can give to our co-workers, friends, and family members.

To listen well, we need to apply empathy. Start by stepping back and realizing that each person is coming from a different place, with unique experiences and stressors. Really try to listen to what they are saying and consider what they might be feeling. This requires your full attention. Reflect their feelings back to them without judgment. To do this, I try to say something along the lines of, “I’ll bet that was hard because…” Even if I don’t correctly guess what they are thinking and feeling, it opens the door to a deeper conversation.

When you listen with empathy, it has a calming effect on people. They feel seen and heard. Recognizing and acknowledging others this way makes it easier to navigate difficult situations. People are often more willing to move on to solutions and come up with better ideas when they feel understood. Sometimes, they don’t want a solution immediately; they may just need you to listen.

I’ve been working on being a better listener at work and home. Sometimes, I draw on my experiences to truly understand how the other person might be feeling. If I can remember to ask whether they want a solution or just want someone to listen, it’s amazing to watch the conversation unfold in a more productive way. I’ve watched a co-worker develop creative solutions after talking through their issues and feeling understood. I’ve seen a potential fight de-escalate between my children. Listening well and with empathy can be a game-changer.